I swear this country is almost as bad as Japan, where the teenage suicide rate is through the roof due to excessive bullying that is ignored by school staff and parents.
This poor kid, resorted to taking a gun to school to scare the principal into stopping other students from bullying him. Some examples of the bullying? His head was stuffed in a toilet, he was stuffed in lockers and shoved into bushes. I don’t know what school you went to, but when I was in school and I went to the principal’s office to tell him that I’d been stuffed in a locker, the students responsible got suspended from school for a week. Phone calls were made to their parents, and their parents came to school to pick them up with the most angry, pissed off look on their faces that a parent could ever make. Those kids, got into serious trouble. They didn’t spend that week long suspension sitting at home, playing their xbox, guaranteed.
Back in my day, kids got in trouble for doing crap like that. Now, students go and talk to counselors about how they felt at the time they did these things, and what drove them to behave that way, and told not to do it anymore. Then they are sent to in school suspension for the remainder of the school day and parents are not notified that the child has been causing trouble at school. In in school suspension, they can color pictures and read books so long as all their other school work is done. They are given many activities to keep them busy, and they are not required to spend that time thinking about their crime.
Why don’t schools call parents? The schools fear they may contribute to parent abuse of a child, and that bullying is often a learned behavior. Child abuse often rears its ugly head to schools in the form of bruises with stories that don’t make sense, and kids lying about the abuse to school officials. It was often discovered by teachers back in my day. Believe me, if there is abuse in a home, there is little that a public school’s lack of involvement in the home life will do to stop that from happening, if anything at all.
Why should you care? Because it’s your kid’s head that’s getting shoved into a toilet. Maybe you own a firearm, maybe you don’t. That’s irrelevant. If people get desperate enough about a situation, and authority figures do not help them, they will take matters into their own hands whether they should or not.
Which is better? School shootings, or no school shootings? School shootings were unheard of prior to the advent of “feel good schooling”. Personally… I’d rather my kid not get shot by your kid because the school didn’t talk to you about the problems your kid was having. Just a thought.
I agree – why do schools look the other way. You will not convince me that they don’t. I have a child that has been through middle school and is now in high school and I see it every time I walk on campus. Girls being pushed (initmidated) by boys, jumpings, etc. Truly fed up with lame-o excuses.
While bullying is not new – it was not ignored. And the actions of these bullys are mor organized and worse than when I was growing up.
I don’t know the answer – I know it begins at home but so many kids these days do not have the home life many of us adults grew up with. Parents did not have to work 2-3 jobs to stay on top. Schools practiced discipline.
Students who bullying do not all come from homes where bullying is learned. Indeed, students who bullying can be found in religious youth groups and affluent communities. Bullying (peer abuse) is a “peer pressure” behavior as much as alcohol is. The behavior is ignored by many educational staff and the reasons include attitudes about who should handle it–parents, victims, or providers of care (school staff). Educators need, at the very least, to take an action to prevent harm when students/parents request their help. Signed: Educator and Clinical Social Worker
I saw this first hand with Bug in Spokane. Nothing was done to the boy that bullied her until he threatened to bring a gun to school and shoot her with it. Then, and only then, he got suspended. Personally, I took my Dad’s stance on the bullying. As a child, I was bullied by a boy on my school bus. Unfortunately, he got off at the same stop I did, which made it that much more intolerable. My Dad talked to the school. He talked to the bus driver. He talked to the boy’s parents. When all that failed, he told me to slug him the next time he did it off school property. You know what? I balled up my fist and knocked his socks off. He never bullied me again. I gave that same advice to my daughter after all other options proved fruitless. She never acted on it, but she felt better knowing she could with no reprisals from her Mom. Now that we’ve moved to back to MT, the difference in the school system is refreshing. She actually decked her bullier here. And, she got in trouble for it, but only because she didn’t bother going to the school or anyone else because of her conditioning from the WA school system. Once the school was aware of the problem, the bullier was watched and punished for his actions. His parents were notified. The classes in that grade had visits from the counselor to talk about bullying and it’s ramifications. The counselor, the principal and the parents all worked together. That’s what it should be.
Nome, you’re making me think that I need to move to a red state.
Catherine: Regardless of who teachers and educators think is responsible, there is an undeniable fact in all of this. For seven hours a day, my child is the responsibility of the public school. The law *REQUIRES* my child to leave my care and protection and enter school. I do not have a choice. There are no viable alternatives to middle income families because private schools are too expensive, and home schooling is not an option in dual-income households.
I have no choice about where my child goes to school and public educators where I live are simply not doing their jobs. I’m sure there are a litany of reasons as to why they stay out of bullying incidents, but for me, as a parent of a child that has been bullied since the first grade, those “reasons” seem more like excuses.
These excuses could mean the difference between life and death for my child. My child’s life may mean nothing to a school teacher, but it means everything to me. The choices of a public educator have the power to change my life forever. All I ask of educators, is that they be aware of that and be mindful of the position that I am in, with no alternative but to trust that they will protect my child.
Budha Babe, you’re absolutely right. This is a disturbing sign of our times. I don’t have any answers either, and I agree that in some cases, it starts at home, but since we cannot control what happens inside every home, nor would I want to, we have to look elsewhere for solutions. The second option before us, is for parents to start demanding more responsible behavior from educators in our public schools. We have a responsibility to our children to expect more from our public schools, and when we don’t receive it, I believe that we have a right to demand it.