Argh! That was my FACE!

So.. Lucy is feeling good.

She’s feeling so good that my fears and concerns and negativity about her cancer have just melted away.

She is barking at tweedle dee and tweedle dum across the street. She’s chasing squirrels. She’s plotting the inevitable end of the neighbor’s schnauzer and is STILL attempting to exit our back yard so she can go into the OTHER back yard and play with our other neighbor’s dog, a brittany, whom Mugen intensely dislikes and yet… Lucy wants to make a great friend of. It’s almost as if she’s trying to play with this dog to spite Mugen.

She is also doing this, while rolling my butt out of bed at 6 am, because Daddy’s awake and this means that Mom must be awake shortly thereafter. In spite of the fact that it is summer and we are NOT going to hop in the car and go to Starbucks because I have the robo-espresso that saves me 5$ a day on lattes and feeds my caffeine addiction with a continuous stream of body, heart and crema.

But… there’s more.

A while ago, Mugen’s interior butt tucking circuit began to include my window bench. This bench is a part of the house and is a six foot long 2 foot wide piece of wood. Reilly jumped up on it and barked at tweedle dee and tweedle dum and scratched the surface a bit, but no REAL damage to the wood. Once Mugen’s butt tucking circuit began to include jumping up on the window seat, I had to do something because he was making Reilly’s old surface scratches become gouges. So… I grabbed a hallway runner and put it on the window seat to protect the wood.

The dogs… LOVE that I did this.

Mugen and Lucy get up there ALL the time for naps. If I sit down on the window seat, Mugen plops his butt up there next to me for cuddles. Lucy likes to stretch out with her head on the window sill and watches the world go by while I’m vacuuming the floor.

This is probably the best idea I have ever had in the history of owning this house.

So I walked into the parlor today and there was Miss Lucy on the window seat. She looked up and her tail slammed that rug and made a deep “thud, thud, thud” noise as I walked over to her. Mugen followed me into the room and Mugen did what he always does when Lucy is perched on something.

He play bowed and barked twice. We have determined this is Mugen speak for “Play with me! Play with me NOW or I will bite your kneecaps!” which… is the next thing he will do if Lucy does not gesture back at him. He’s a very persistent little stinker.

I… being the IDIOT that I am… sat down next to Lucy on the window seat and planned to watch all of this pan out. I did not expect to see Lucy shove me to one side so that she could do the following in this order:

  1. Dive bomb Mugen from a height of about a foot.

  2. Grab his cheek.

  3. Drag him to the floor by his cheek.

  4. Stick her butt in the air and thump her tail…. into my face.

This turn of events set Mugen off… and he started butt tucking across the parlor/dining room portion of my house.

I was too stunned by Lucy’s tail smacking me across the cheek to realize what was about to happen next.

As Mugen took off, my hand went to my face, Lucy sat on my left foot and proceeded to watch Mugen run. Mugen made the figure 8 circuit around the dining room table and then turned to head back in our direction and he paused for a tenth of a second to spring onto the window seat and that is when a synapse fired in my brain and I suddenly thought to myself…

“Crap. This is gonna hurt.”

Mugen launched himself at my face. His chest connected with my left glasses lens and smashed it into my eyebrow.

I have a cold, which means my sinuses are agony today.

The pain of having my glasses rammed up into my forehead made my sinus pain seem completely irrelevant.

The rapid fire cursing that happened afterwards caused Mugen to stop in his tracks. He parked his butt next to mine on the window seat and looked at me with his worried, “I’m not sure if I should get much closer, but I don’t want to go much further away either.” look.. and Lucy just watched me and looked completely… and totally… amused.

I walked out on the gruesome twosome saying only… and in my best impression of my grandmother’s voice…

“Y’all are on your own.”

Now they are sitting in the kitchen doorway, watching me type. Their adorable heads tilted at exactly the same angle.

And I love them.. but I’m pretty sure they are plotting my demise.