So this morning, after 3 weeks… I received yet another anonymous text message from some person looking for some guy named Dave. It started a while back. My husband and I were watching House, and I was getting phone calls from this dude who sounded like he was stoned saying, “Eh… is Dave there?”
The problem is, I know several guys named Dave, and in an emergency situation, I could see one of them giving a stoner my phone number if he had no one else to turn to, so I always asked, “Which Dave, I know two and none of them live with me.” Stoner Dude (not his real name), hung up after saying, “Well it was his number this morning. Aww man!” After three days of this, I finally managed to convince Stoner Dude that this was not his phone number, and that he was going to have to come up with another way to get in touch with his friend. I figured… the guy was a stoner. It’s entirely possible he just mis-dialed a lot, or wrote down the wrong number for his friend. Fine. I let this incident go.
All was quiet for like a week. Then I got a phone call from this gentlemanly gentleman who asked me very nicely if “Dave” was there. I told him that he had the wrong number, and that I had already talked to Dave’s friend Stoner Dude, and apparently Dave is giving out my number for some reason. I asked him if he would mind asking Dave to stop giving out my number, and he said that he would as soon as he tracked him down, and apologized for bothering me. I never received a phone call from this gentleman again.
Over the course of the next two weeks, I would randomly get phone calls from catty girls, looking for Dave. I told every single one of them that Dave wasn’t at this number, one of them even called me a b-word before she hung up on me.
By this morning, I had had enough of Dave and Dave’s friends, so when I got a text message from a phone number I didn’t know, I snapped. What you see below is a recaptured conversation from my iPhone, with names and numbers changed.
From Weird Number: “Hey”
Me: “Some guy named Dave has been giving out my number for 3 weeks. Looking 4 him right? Would you mind telling him 2 stop? I’ve had this # a long time and don’t want to change it. Thnx!”
Weird Number: “Who is this?”
Me: “The person who’s tired of Dave’s friends calling her at 3 am. Who also doesn’t know who you are or why you txt msg’d her. Just assuming u are a friend of Dave’s.”
Weird Number: “I didn’t text anyone!”
Me: “Weird. I got a txt from this # Sorry to bother you. No caffeine, little sleep due to phone calls all night.”
Weird Number: “And you got a text from this number? When? Who is this?”
Me: “9:10 am. I’m (random gemini, of course!), you are?”
Weird Number: “Wilson. I am sorry you are getting calls but I have never texted this number before, nor do I know who you are.”
Me (at this point, seething and ready to call my provider and scream… ): “No prob. I’ll call my provider about it.”
Wilson could have let it go there, but this bothered him for some reason, so he kept asking me questions. While he was trying to trouble shoot, it came out that he worked at an AT&T store. So we made arrangements for me to head down there so that we could figure this whole thing out, and then I found out that Wilson’s phone is security locked… no one else could have texted me from his phone. He was confused by all of this, then he asked me to just call the store instead, because he was concerned someone had doubled up my phone number with another customer’s number. I agreed to do this, made my coffee and got ready to call him when I received the following text from Wilson.
Wilson: “Oh wait! LOL! You are not gonna believe this! I did text you! This customer who was in here just now has almost the same phone number as you! He said his texts were not working, his number is 555-1213 (mine is 555-1212) and he gave me the wrong number! I apologize!”
Me: “Thank you so much! Glad it was something simple. You’re awesome! What days do you work? I want to bring you cookies.”
It turns out, Dave had been mistakenly giving out my phone number since getting his brand new cell phone, and didn’t understand why his friends never called, and his phone never rang and why he wasn’t getting his text messages. Wilson straightened the guy out and after giving me his work schedule, he offered to help me any time I had problems with my account.
Now that ladies and gentlemen, is what I call customer service. I was rude to this guy. He didn’t have to help me, and he did anyway. I will be taking him some home made Oatmeal Scotchies tomorrow because he deserves them for putting up with the way I treated him. The customer service hotline for AT&T sucks, but I love talking to the people in the stores where I live. They really care about making sure that I’m happy, even if I’m a bitch.